- Blow On The Cartridge
- Posts
- The Goonies II
The Goonies II
Cyndi Lauper in 8-bit never sounded so good
In partnership with
PRESS START
An Introduction To Today’s Game
The Goonies II. I remember the confusion when I first saw this at Toys R Us. I loved the film and had always wished for a sequel, so why was there a game for a movie that didn't exist?
My friends and I went on a mission to track down this mysterious sequel. This was before the Internet, so we couldn't just google it. We asked around, scoured video stores, checked TV listings. You can guess how this ended.
There was no film sequel. Never has been, despite 40 years of rumors. Even if we did get it, I’m sure it would just be added to the list of all the other dissapointing legacy sequels. Poor Indiana Jones, what did they do to you?
So yeah, no official sequel. What we got instead was this NES cult classic: innovative, memorable, and deeply flawed. Hit the Cyndi Lauper song and let’s check out this game sequel to the 80’s classic film.
BEHIND THE PIXELS
Let’s Dive Into The Game
If you've never played it, The Goonies II is a hybrid adventure that splits its time between two distinct gameplay styles. Think Metroid meets a point-and-click adventure, except everything is more confusing than either of those games.
The main game plays as a side-scrolling platformer where you control Mikey through interconnected environments. You'll explore ice caverns, underwater passages, and volcanic tunnels, all while fighting snakes, spiders, and skeletons with your trusty yo-yo. As you progress, you'll find better weapons like slingshots, boomerangs, and even Molotov cocktails, though combat remains fairly basic throughout.
The platforming remains solid decades later.
The twist comes when you enter doors scattered throughout each level. The game suddenly shifts to a first-person perspective where you navigate rooms using text commands similar to Shadowgate. Here's where things get weird. You must punch walls, examine objects, and talk to NPCs to find hidden items and your captured friends. Each rescued Goonie increases your health bar, and you need all six before you can free Annie the mermaid and complete the game.
A mermaid? Yup, you read that right.
The first person sections? Not so much.
These first-person sections sound interesting in theory but quickly become exercises in frustration. There's no logic to where items hide or which walls are secret passages. You'll spend significant time punching every surface hoping something happens.
The game provides vague hints from NPCs, but they rarely help. Three separate strategy guides were published in Japan, which tells you everything about the difficulty. Most reviews for the game even stated you would most likely need a strategy guide in order to compete the game.
A Zelda like inventory and map helps track your progress.
The platforming holds up better, with solid level design featuring multiple routes to destinations and clever shortcuts. The interconnected world feels ambitious for 1987, predating the Metroidvania genre we know today.
The audio deserves special mention. The 8-bit rendition of Cyndi Lauper's "Goonies R Good Enough" remains catchy decades later, and the atmospheric music fits the underground exploration perfectly. A good song can take a retro game a long ways. Graphics are typical NES fare but get the job done, with clear sprites and distinct environments from fire zones to icy caverns. It’s nothing special to look at but the overall package has its charm.
One Habit You’ll Keep
By this time of the year, most New Year goals are already slipping. That’s why the habits that last are the simple ones.
AG1 Next Gen is a clinically studied daily health drink that supports gut health, helps fill common nutrient gaps, and supports steady energy.
With just one scoop mixed into cold water, AG1 replaces a multivitamin, probiotics, and more, making it one of the easiest upgrades you can make this year.
Start your mornings with AG1 and get 3 FREE AG1 Travel Packs, 3 FREE AGZ Travel Packs, and FREE Vitamin D3+K2 in your Welcome Kit with your first subscription.
WHERE TO PLAY
The original copy or emulation will be your best bet in playing this.
Original Copies of the Game (All prices in USD)
Loose: $12
Complete: $62
New/Sealed: $400
GAME INFORMATION
|  |
Cover Art
Is this the cutest heating pad ever?
If you’re looking for a gift that’s fun, functional, and irresistibly nostalgic, the Happy Helpers Pop-Tart Heating Pad deserves a top spot in your holiday roundup. This heating pad version of the iconic Strawberry Frosted Pop-Tart heats up in the microwave to provide gentle, lasting relief from cramps, tension, and everyday aches.
Ideal for stocking stuffers, White Elephant parties, or anyone who appreciates a cozy pick-me-up with a playful twist. This warm, toasty “treat” is one holiday gift that’s sure to bring cheer!
RETRO HARDWARE
Reading about retro games is great, but playing them is the real goal. This new Retro Hardware section is about easy, affordable ways to get those classics running without the headache.
Miyoo Mini Plus
The Miyoo Mini Plus. My first retro device I ever bought. Slightly bigger than the original Miyoo Mini, the Plus model adds a larger screen and a more comfortable grip, making it easy to toss in a bag and take on the go when I dare to leave my protective man cave. (Still scary.)
The Miyoo Mini Plus is an entry-level retro handheld, but in the best possible way. It excels at playing classic systems like NES, SNES, Game Boy, Game Boy Color, Game Boy Advance, Sega Genesis, and a massive arcade library, all of which run great. It’s simple, affordable, and perfect for anyone looking to dip their toes into retro gaming without overcomplicating things.
My readers can use the following code for a 12% discount: NY12
Click either of the pictures to take you to the website.
Some links in this section are affiliate links. If you buy through MECHDIY, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.
GAME OVER
Why You Should Play This
So should you track down The Goonies II today? That depends on your tolerance for old-school obtuseness. The platforming sections remain enjoyable, showcasing innovative design that influenced countless games afterward. The interconnected world, multiple paths, and sense of exploration still impress.
But those first-person segments? They've aged like milk. Without a guide, you'll wander aimlessly, punching walls and getting nowhere. The game expects you to either have psychic powers or infinite patience. Modern players will find this design philosophy maddening.
If you're curious, play it with a walkthrough handy. You'll appreciate Konami's ambition and see why this game influenced the Metroidvania genre. The music alone makes it worth experiencing. Just don't expect the satisfying treasure hunt the movie promised.
The Goonies II works best as a historical artifact. It's good enough for a playthrough, even if you'll be shouting at your screen half the time. The Goonies never say die, even when they probably should have asked for better directions.
Reply